Drinking Humor Gifts

Do not allow your owner to foul the footpath.

A Delicate Hint.

"I think it is silly to assume people drank more during the lockdown."

A man drinks wine

Bar: Now serving 24 hours - 'I want to get as wasted as you look.'

Complementary Beverages

"Look at Ernie. He's so tipsy, he's walking face forward."

Very drunk professional cyclist

Virtual Lap Dancing

"I feel like I've just been played my whole life."

'It's time you booked yourself into rehab!'

"Tell me more about your problem - I understand it's drink related."

Bar, My dog doesn't understand me.

'I'm trying a beer diet: lager for breakfast, bock for lunch, and IPA for dinner. So far, I'm losing 2 days per week.'

'I'm sorry, boss, but you tell them to leave.'

Canadian Alcoholidaze.

Drunken rooster has a hangover while sun rises.

"Leave the toilet."

'Are you trying to be funny?'

Drunken cyclist

'You STUPID fool Ryan! Didn't i warn you not to go JUDGING his cover?!' / A book has just been bashed around a bit for judging another book's cover.

"Laugh if you will, but my kind once ruled the earth."

Drunken Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

Alcoholidays: Beethovens fifth.

'I don't think I've seen your brother, what does he look like?'

"I drink to forget."

Santa's Little Enablers

'If that's my wife, tell her meow, meuwwf, meew, hiss.'

'The way I see it, sobriety is a preventable, condition.'

"No, no, no! We never start playing with an empty jar!"

'Then I hit him with my three-legged punch. . .I hit him with my stool.'

'You've got it wrong,luv-it's Fido who's the boozer!'

"If that's humankind, I'm not here!"

A drunk man being told to get up out of the gutter by a policeman

Man offering a drink to a drowning man