Drinking Enthusiast Gifts

"Anyone here a 'worthless, no-good drunken bum'?"

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

'No! I'm not lending you any more money until you pay back what you owe me!' 'Forget it. I can't wait that long!'

"When I'm legless, make sure to switch me to the cheaper brands..."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"Buy a man a six-pack, he drinks for a day. Teach him to brew, he drinks all his life."

You're the botanicals in my gin

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

'Gimme a Canadian club on the rocks!'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

"Jack Daniels-in-a-box"

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

'Would you care to see our wine list, water list, soda list, tea list, coffee list, single malt scotch list, or beer list?'

'The King of what?'

"In addition to the regular menu, today's specials are . . ."

"Scientists may need a trillion dollar atom smasher to explore the fundamental questions of the universe, but all you need is one too many."

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"I do like a plant that can hold its drink"

"There are no such things as problems, only opportunities."

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

'The way I see it, drinking is its own reward.'

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

A Snowman falls down drunk outside a bar.

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"

'Okay then, what's the price break on TWENTY drinks?'

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

Man at work sees in lounge refrigerator, 'Creative Juices'

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'