Doggy Defender Gifts

"Did you or did you not perform the fake ball toss on my client, causing irreparable humiliation?"

'He marks his territory with such thoroughness.'

My first pro bono case.

'I'll kill that dog of yours.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

No Soliciting

'I said: Leave my son alone!'

A Change of Scene.

'Now listen: Based on the position of the kennel and the length of the leash, only the shaded part of the garden is dangerous...'

'Oh, the usual, a postman, a couple of salesmen, a pizza delivery boy, how was your day?'

'You're leaving if I'm going to inject him?...

Due To High Winds Crawling Is Banned Today

"I guess people want dogs with no problems. Lucky for me, all I've got is quirks."

Dog being carried off by ducks.

"Humans destroy our natural habitat and then say we're an invasive species."

'Oh oh...this isn't my mace, it's whipped cream!'

Uh-oh, They're evolving!

Bug: A Fingerplay to Promote Empathy with the Differently Evolved

An angry group of Rhinoceros have finally found the Poachers responsible for cutting off their horns.

Save the Cacti.

'Do you get the feeling we're being watched?' Moles prepare for their assault on a newly mowed lawn

'What are your feelings on the use of dolphins in warzones?'...

Droplet with a pencil.

Only very few of the lumbering giants relied on speed...

Revenge of the Mallards.

"Sorry Matilda, but we're going to have to let you go...on the bright side, I hear they're hiring over at Chik-Fi

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

"Boy o boy, that's not good: The hunters don't even want to negotiate..."

"Don't even think about it!"

Why the "Man's Best Friend" thing is a total fraud.

Lactose is Good. Lactose intolerance isn't something you protest against, Ernie.

"Save ALL animals, you bastard!"