Dog Lover Chuckles Gifts

"Good Lord, it wasn't a dream after all! I did shake hands with Rudy Giuliani!!"

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Dog on a Shelf.

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

"Oo, I get to write a memo! I'm excited! I'm excited!"

'Hey, I just mopped the yard.'

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

'You know that's not what I meant when I asked you to take the dog out!'

House with 'Dog For Sale' sign. Cat walks by holding 'Good Riddance' sign.

Cattery and kennels

'I'll be darn lad when your mail-order waders get here!'

'You sound like a bunch of cats! The growl has to be deeper and the barks crisper. Okay, let's take it again from the first howl.'

"New tricks CD Rom"

'I'm good with sheep. . .'

Dog urinating on a work of art.

'I'll donate them to ANYONE but a DOG.'

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

"That's where I do 'my business'."

"A text? Since when did the dog stop barking when he wanted to come in?"

Don't even think about it!

Re-explore familiar surroundings. You may come across some fresh, new surprises!

Dog smelling Halloween mask on other dog's butt.

"Same thing every year, I tell Santa I want my balls back, and I get a freaking stuffed animal."

"What?"

"I chase my tail, roll in stuff, howl at the moon. What kind of life is that?"

'I've got a dog and I'm worried that it might catch avian flu from a turkey and develop a new strain of caninebird flu that I might catch!...Have you got something I can take to stop that happening?'

"The bones...have they been buried for the full 21 days?"

Pecking order - pecking out of order.

Bingo's Time Out - Part Two

"Can I order off the menu?"

...wait a minute. It's not really National Hot Dog Day?!

'There's a fly in my soup.'

"It's called 'salad,' but it's really just a hunk of raw meat."

"...if my boss likes what he sees in here, you’ll be rolling in treats."