Doctor Detourist Gifts

'Hang on a minute, Doc, these certificates are for veterinary medicine!'

"Hope you don't mind, but I can't find my little hammer."

"Perhaps you wouln't have declared so many places 'worth a detour' if you'd held the map right way up!"

'I'm going to be a little late.'

'Confused about your future, depressed, lacking confidence, not sure who you can trust...I'd suggest you avoid any election news and watch modern family instead.'

"Well, there's nothing wrong with his lungs anyway."

"I cancelled my last appointment without phoning the Doctor... so I'm making up for it by showing up without phoning!"

'Don't tell me we've been following the wrong light!'

"Excuse me, is this the third turning on the left?"

I like having an older doctor. He understands my ailments and has most of em!

'Don't cough up a furball then tell me you knitted a sweater' (Dr. Pheline)

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about Lyme disease."

Dr Dinaram Cardiology: Hurt Feelings and Broken Hearts

'I could kiss it and make it better, but it's not covered by your insurance.'

Susan unexpectedly found herself living life in the fast lane due to a road detour.

"I don't understand. I gave up smoking two years ago."

"So, how do you like your new medical website?"

"How's the self-diagnosis coming?"

Roads.

Road Closed: Next Left: Nowhere in particular.

'I want to change to another doctor, because I've read all of the magazines in your waiting room.'

'The doctor will be a little late...why don't you discuss each others ailments until he gets here!'

Detour Sign

'It never fails: The shortest distance between two points is always under construction.'

'I don't like needles: You'll catch me if I faint, won't you doc?'

All Roads Closed for Repair

A car takes a detour to the 'New Normal'.

"I'd like to see you a little taller, and a little younger."

'Nowhere fast, next right.'

'It's a new Rupert Murdoch production -- the 'Things You're Better Off Not Knowing' channel.'

Amazing.

Detour: Proceed at your own risk and gas cost.

'It's Sunday. I'm calling for a separation of church and sports.'

Construction ahead detour.

Detour