Discussions On Law Enforcement Gifts

Robot Bombs: A One Time Thing, Right?

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

"Strawman argument terrorises conversation... News at eleven."

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

Totalitarian Humour

"Our therapist couple be so proud of us now."

"Careful! He knows computers."

"I knew we'd eventually catch him. He can't run and run as fast as he once did."

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'When I grow up I want to join the SWAT team!'

'I hate frisking magicians!'

A book reviewer reads between the margins.

Mobsters at the Beach

Racial Profiling

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

Scars and Bars

Family traits.

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

Old West Bounty Hunter.

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

'If you'll excuse me, my car is on fire.'

-'Okay Rebel, find the drugs.' -'Are you kidding? There's dirty underwear here!'

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

'What the … ? How did those thugs get into my car?'

"I'm sorry- when you said 'bad' cop, I assumed you meant incompetent."