Policing Themes Gifts

Flying Squad

'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'

Police Feline Unit

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Fist Bumper Cars

'Come out with your fins up!'

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

'Time machine materialises in Westminster Lord Lucan arrested'

Next camera crew 5 mins

"As a rookie, I'm finding one of the hardest things to get used to is older people calling me 'sir.'"

Police film evidence

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

Just our luck...old school crime translation classes!

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

Police Cow!

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

"When I grow up I'm going to be a police officer and follow in my dad's footsteps."

"Yes, I was using my mobile whilst driving... I was calling the police to tell them I was chasing a gang of bank robbers!"

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."

'Not much cop are you!'

Cat points to the dog who injured him, at a police station.

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

'Now I don't know what it's like in New York, but this is Kansas city, and we follow the laws of physics out here.'

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

'It's a slow trap.'

Police Lineup Escape

J.P.Hensmore Superintendent AKA Head Honcho, The Big Guy,The Man, Numero Uno and The Big Cheese.

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'

Well, you're busted! Forensics just came back: the bite-marks match your dental records!