Digital Scribe Gifts

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

"Before I do this, I would ask everyone to please delete the footage in the event of this not going as planned."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

"So start throwing together about 10 novels a week and bring them in on Wednesdays."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"I'm sorry, Walter, but I need room to write."

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

Script/Director/Producer/Decency Panel.

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

Monks sitting at a row of computers typing up old-fashioned looking manuscripts.

"It was only when I started to write the story of my life that I realised I'd forgotten to have one."

Writer breaks in new electric typewriter.

Waiting Room For Godot.

"Here it is - my novel. I'll be interested to hear your compliments."

'Hurry up, I'm dying to use the blog'

'We have the ideas for product placement and now all we need is the script.'

Writers Block: "Day 24 and still no typewriter!"

'Sorry, your resume isn't funny enough.'

"I'm writing a novel, but it's hard to find alone time."

Trump and social media

Writers strike.

Pencil Rubber

'Your story is extremely sexist, dubious and dumb, the characters are one-dimensional and primitive. In other words - you wrote a bestseller, mister!'

"He calls it the eBible."

Plato's Republic as it was written and as it would have been written if Plato's academy had invested in a good word processor,

"Philosopical argument needs an elephant in the room. Can you handle it, sweetie?"

"Buying stuff online has rekindled Sean's literary ambitions. They're always asking for customer reviews."

Chicken soup for the bloggers soul.

'My blog has its own blog.'

"Steve, trust me, this has nothing to do with you being self-published."

'I've gotten quite a bit out of that creative writing class. I think I'll become a literary agent.'