Creative Scribe Gifts

'I've gotten quite a bit out of that creative writing class. I think I'll become a literary agent.'

"The most useful course I've ever done was the "Creative Writing" course I did as a kid: It's been invaluable in writing Grant Applications..."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

Pencil Rubber

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"Meet The Author"

'So you want an advance on your writer's block?'

Edgar Allen Poe

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

'My 'What I Did Over The Weekend' report is about my hunting a 17,000 pound moose, deep inside Canada.Some or all of this report has been fictionalized for dramatic purposes.'

'What a CV - if you can write memos like this you'll go far in our organisation.'

"Looking at you, the moon and beyond, don't you think we could start a blog?"

'I'll blurb you if you'll blurb me.'

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."

Literary Canines.

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

"Of course I failed you — your essay was original and unique and obviously written by a human."

"You have word-ill."

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

Up-to-date Career-Specific Romance Novels

Display of political memoirs books categorized as: 'Non-fiction,' 'Fiction,' and 'Pure Fantasy'.

Cow of BEEF

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

How a poet works

"Your top 10 list of reasons why you didn't do your homework is creative, but not acceptable."

Adam and Eve, as old people.

Script/Director/Producer/Decency Panel.

"Why have you called him ballpoint?"

"We must kill this initiative, so let's mainstream it."

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

'And this is our new INTERACTIVE card - you buy the blank cardboard and write it yourself!'

'Syrian, no, Iranian secret agents ate my homework.'

Folk o' the Wee