Creative Scribbler Gifts

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

A pen spewing letters

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

The New Fundamentals of Art: 'We'll begin with the most basic figure, the trademark attorney...'

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

BOOKSHOP, 'We're pushing our do-it-yourself kit today, sir -- a ream of paper and a dozen pencils.'

'Anorak anoraks'.

Replacement Bus Spotters.

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

Bird Watching with Binoculars

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

Hans Holbein

Will Self deprecation

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

Musical Prodigy

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'

How to create a brilliant cartoon

Writer’s Corner

"Is this the wobbly table? I'll put my screenplay under this leg."

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

"Would it hurt you to take two minutes from writing code to write your grandmother?"

'Dammit, Bubbles, we need this memoir yesterday - write, damn you!'

Pencil Rubber

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

Recycling Station: Manuscripts.

Kate Atkinson

"Careful - it's full of lies."

"It took me 4 years to finish my book!"