Spiritual Scribbler Gifts

Monk with a crucifix pen.

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"How about we write a song combining Brexit with unrequited love?"

I'm currently working on my autobiography. Would you care to help make page 327 interesting?

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

Will Self deprecation

"Regarding your letter of next Monday ... "

Now that I've written the book, could you put in a good word with the sales team's muse?

'Are you sure this is the only way to get rid of your writers block?'

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'

Screenwriters, Inc. Send this revised script to Rupert Murdoch! Right! I'll fax the fix to Fox!

Anna Burns

"Is this the wobbly table? I'll put my screenplay under this leg."

Writer’s Corner

"Bible studies class? We're still writing it."

"I would take out the curse words, but otherwise I think it's fine."

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

Writer's Block

"It's an unfinished Wordle."

'Dammit, Bubbles, we need this memoir yesterday - write, damn you!'

A pen spewing letters

"It's the worst case of writer's block Sidney has ever had. He hasn't put a word on the page since fifth grade!"

Recycling Station: Manuscripts.

Commandments block.

"It took me 4 years to finish my book!"