Scripture Scribbler Gifts

"Bible studies class? We're still writing it."

"I imagine the men who wrote the Bible giggled every time they wrote 'I am the lord'."

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

"More rescue efforts, less screenplay."

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."

"How about we write a song combining Brexit with unrequited love?"

Replacement Bus Spotters.

"Your editor called again to see if the well was still dry."

Script/Director/Producer/Decency Panel.

Shakespeare working on his "author's bio"

Never write a sonnet on an empty stomach

Writer: Humour and Tragedy.

'Don't write on that wall with crayons! It'll show up better on that wall over there.'

"The trouble with spelling rules is that they impede creativity."

'I'm a writer.' - 'What a coincidence, I'm a reader.'

"I had that dream again where you're writing down all my fears and anxieties and working them into a screenplay."

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

"Having completed the formation of the earth, on the seventh day the Lord rested. Then, on the eighth day, the Lord said, 'Let there be problems.' And there were problems."

Colin kept a notebook by his bed to write down any ideas he had during the night... "Genulph hyu donkey slapperthwaite."

Will Self deprecation

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

Waiting Room For Godot.

A monk illuminating a book with quill pen

Computer literate Monk

'We have the ideas for product placement and now all we need is the script.'

Writer’s Corner

'I have a case of...oh, heck. What's that called?'

"Is this the wobbly table? I'll put my screenplay under this leg."

'Sorry, your resume isn't funny enough.'

'He's just come back from a 'stress management' course.'

"Listen, you'll take another break after Deuteronomy and I'll make you some chicken noodle soup."

'Hold the front page, Brother Cuthbert!'