Artful Scribbler Gifts

"Ah, to be young again."

"I've decided to cut out the middleman and self-publish."

"So start throwing together about 10 novels a week and bring them in on Wednesdays."

"Those are the failed attempts at my first novel."

"It's been done, but I don't think it's been redone."

'After three years of writer's block, I began writing about writer's block.'

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

'Hows it coming?'

'They've agreed to our 3-book, 7-figure offer, but only if you remain obscene and obnoxious through book 2.'

'Are you sure this is the only way to get rid of your writers block?'

'Your poetry totally captures the raw, primitive essence of the writing workshops you've attended.'

'He's just come back from a 'stress management' course.'

"Is this the wobbly table? I'll put my screenplay under this leg."

"I decided to burn all my previous napkins and start fresh."

Writer's Block

"No wonder you're struggling with your novel. You're not wearing your writer's hat."

A pen spewing letters

"Baldo, it's great that you want to draw editorial cartoons for the school paper. But effective cartoons comment on important issues. They are not a forum for your personal agenda."

Recycling Station: Manuscripts.

"That laptop was expensive as hell but publishers are still rejecting my stories! I want my money back!"

Woman writer writing romantical about writing on her unromantic computer

John Bolton

False joviality.

A Winter's Day by Mary Lou Fleckner

Monk with a crucifix pen.

Scribbling Rivalry.

"But I have a hard time calling this real writing."

'Fifty-seven authors, and neither one of us was included.'

'Alvin writes poetry...he he has a great imagination...He imagines someone will actually read that Junk!'