Digital Discourse Fan Gifts

"It killed on social media yet you say it's horrible?" "Lousy is lousy."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"Teleconferencing makes it just like they're in the room with us - things are unclear and difficult to understand."

Help wanted!...Ace Software, Inc...Video Game Tournament...Top 5 players get hired!

I've founded my own religion. Of course you have, Rudy. It's off to a good start. Already, it's being mocked by people of other faiths. If history's any guide, within a couple hundred years, it'll be widely accepted and people who don't believe in it will be persecuted. What are the central tenets of your religion? A true Rudian knows that life is suffering, and winning arguments online is salvation.

"With the whole world in NATO, we won't have to take any more crap from Mars."

Political Analysis

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

“Face it, dear...you’re a chair. You’ll see a lot of ends, but very few beginnings.”

"I just wish I hadn't spent most of my life reading the comments below online news articles"

If a tweet is sent out and no one signs up to read it, does it exist? Happens millions of times a day.

'First you come down, then we talk.'

"No, it's not my birthday, either."

Urp! Homo Eructus.

"Lookin' good, Frosty!"

'Don't keep going on about your cold paws - I've got my own problem!'

Petition to ban petitions from outside this market.

Give Bots the Right to Vote

So Many Exceptions There Are No Community Standards

"Given a choice they'd rather a good red... the blood of capitalists!"

"Our privacy policy has changed. Press 'I Agree,' because what are you really going to do about it?"

"It would be faster for you to do this online."

"Would you like to talk to everyone about it?"

'For now, just watch it -- we can dissect the plot later!'

Science versus Ignorance

"This twit keeps going on about social media echo chambers. I'm unfriending him."

"If this tree is so great, why doesn't he pee on it."

The Internet

'I'll take your money when you're ready.'

"Hey, I like this guy!"

Two men discussing hanging

'He's tweeting!'

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