Dietary Dilemmarians Gifts

"I'm eating for two-for me and the me who is on a diet."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Perhaps sir would like the dessert menu?'

'May future generations forgive you for eating that sausage...'

"Each order comes with 10 minutes of free guilt counseling."

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

Adam and Eve - Food scares

"Ambitions... to eat, drink and be merry."

"Why don't we skip the falafel bar, Sinbad."

'Okay, okay. On second thought, maybe going on a diet isn't necessary.'

"I just want to know if I'm healthy enough for bacon?"

'Chocolate covered raisins, chocolate covered strawberries...is not what I mean when I said that fruit is healthy for you.'

"Never eat anything you can't lift over your head."

'I wouldn't call myself a vegetarian, but I don't eat dead animals either.'

'You were right, doc. Blood is thicker than water.'

Need to block those Cookies Santa!

"No thanks, mom. I'm on a vegetable free diet."

"Just Desserts" and "Unjust Desserts"

"We're wolves, Jessica. We eat veal."

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

"Are you still a vegetarian if you only eat herbivores?"

"If you don't plan on snacking at night, then why did you move the refrigerator in here?"

'well, then, I guess you're also lactose substitute intolerant.'

Advent fridge

'She has been suicidal all day doctor since she read about the fatal effect of too much sugar.'

"Oh no, Professor Enriquez, you misunderstood... When my brother said he was on a vegetarian diet, he meant he only eats vegetarians!"

"It's not that you've chosen the wrong diet, it's just that you're not meant to eat them all at once!"

"Do you have such a thing as low calorie caramel coffee creams?"

'The only problem being a Beefeater is that I'm a vegetarian.'

'Gorgeous or gorging, why do I always have to choose?'

Man at restaurant is presented with his roast pig, as the pigs grieving family look on.

'Finally have an expense account and I'm always on a diet.'