Devilish Humor Aficionado Pillows

Prison Visit.

"We sell beer, but it's non-alcoholic."

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

"Actually, it is a bad time — I’m rushing to get the kids out of the oven."

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Another day at work would be one too many...

Forlornaments: Tools to drain individual and team spirit

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'

"How about if we just winter in hell?"

101 uses of a dead cat: disguise.

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"The Eggsorcist"

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

Grim Reaper Buying CDs...

"Boy, this blooper reel from 'Manchester by the Sea' is a crack-up."

Fleeting illusions of happiness hour 5-7

"'Grim Reapers' was considered too offensive, these days we're known as 'afterlife facilitators.'"

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

'Wait! Let's see if he gets up on his own.'

'I don't think you quite grasp our overall motif.'

'I had no idea would be a choice.'

"And this is our new HR officer in charge of morale..."

Going Down?

"The boss told me I have to start at the bottom."

Vlad the Wholesaler

"Siri, find an ICU near me."

Meowlzebub

"Are you Matthew Jones with a double 'T'?"

"Congratulations! You've made the short-list for who we're blaming."

'Any ideas on motive?' 'Only one, Chief.'

"Any references?"

'Wait! Wait a minute! Would you hold my glasses?'

'Don't worry. We still have a few more treatment options available.'