Dealing With School Cliques Gifts

"You're right, that new girl has a great personality, terrific hair, and dynamite figure, so we agree....we hate her, right?"

"Have you been on the moon again, young man?"

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

Thinks he's too cool for school.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'What are the other nonconformists wearing this year?'

'Before we start, I'd like legal representation.'

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

Will eat your homework for $.

'Can you debunk my essay?'

'I wasn't playing hooky -- I was fleeing the deteriorating public school system.'

"Well, if the test is multiple choice I choose not to take it."

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

Can you help on our arts night for the environment? I'll be studying. Eco club. That's so short-sighted. I'm in 3 AP science classes. Someday I'll discover ways to organically eradicate pollution. Eco club. That's sooo long-sighted.

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

"Do I get to lawyer up before I see the Principal?"

'That's our group plan.'

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

'At least you won't have to worry about the rising costs of a college education.'

'No sir, we're not boarding a flight. My teacher just needs to check my homework in my my dog Sam here, if it wouldn't be too much trouble.'

Kid sheltering from rain inside a vault box.

'You got everyfink Bruv? Stink bombs, pea shooter, dead frogs . . .'

'I wish somebody would say something.'

"EINSTEIN! Stop fooling around and pay attention...."

Lady to lady about disguised lady: 'She's new to our Secret Sister program.'

'Sorry, I can't talk now, Mr. Harris, I'm texting right now! I'll take whatever punishment you want to give me.'

"Yes, it's report card time again."

"I'd trade, but peanut butter sticks to my tongue stud."

"Grandma, this is now how some schools say obey the rules."

Be sure to tell us if the school tries cyberspying again. Ok, mom. It's wrong to snap webcam pics of students. Uh-huh. They shouldn't use computers that way! Besides, it's a waste of time. They could just check the kid's facebook page, What were they thinking?

"It's the whole kindergarten thing, Mom. I'm alone in there, swimming with the sharks."

'We should try harder to behave. We're wearing a rut in this floor.'