Clever Cliques Gifts

'Well, if you need me to put it into 'layman's terms' maybe you should be talking to someone with a lower IQ.'

"That's Brian Eggleston, de facto leader of the playground intelligentsia."

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"The cat told me to eat your homework."

"If you could be in any cubicle, which one would it be?"

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"Repeat after me: We are delivering the proactive core value promises and rolling out our real time best practice action plan going forward ..."

Countervailing Clichés.

'They took my Science Fair Award away. They said I ate too much fish, which is brainfood. So, it was like I was on mental steroids.'

The Devil's in the detail!

'Here's the good news. 'Happy camper' and 'are we having fun yet' have been added to the official list of banned cliches.'

'It's negative attention ... as long as you keep asking why, they'll keep on doing it.'

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

Good stripper cop / Bad stripper cop

"If all you have is a whatchamacallit then every problem looks like a thingamajig."

'Lookout, here comes another boatload of cartoonists.'

Leopards do change their spots

'I'd like to push the envelope, go the extra mile, and think outside the box to facilitate a win-win solution to the over-utilization of buzzwords.'

'Too many cliches? Now hold your horses!'

"There is such a thing as a free lunch-it just tastes bad."

'Reserved' (presumably for little miss muffet)

'Let's rock!'

"There are far too many balls in your court, Brintner!"

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

"Herewith, we recommend the following: when you're up to your rear in alligators, it's worth remembering your original purpose was to drain the swamp...."

"Take us to your feeder."

"Why does he keep in the same players?"

Pushing the envelope.

"I am studying the alphabet. I'm watching ABC."

"And he's a nutritional-support animal, too."

'Did you know I have 3000 bones in my body?'

A panhandler with a sign that reads "I'll never work in this town again!".

Jeffrey N.: The Guy who managed to get the lead out of his pants, but they were still the wrong pants.