Dark Romantic Gifts

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'

"Ooh, Igor — a dead rat! You shouldn’t have!"

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

Edgar Allen Poe

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Sauvignon Bonk

Venus

"You're such a good listener."

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

'More bubbles!'

Dead Funny

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

"Why don't you find a museum!"

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Diamond outfits

Love linked

Love Conquers All

Paint pots in love

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

"You're my Mona Lisa."

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

"Now there's a relationship that's working!"

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

'What the..? She IS a stick!'

STILL LIVES - Bolt: 'It's like we were made for one another!'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

"My only love sprung from my only hate!"