Dark Romantic T-Shirts

'Better call the coroner, Mahoney... I can't tell if this is a homicide or some sicko's idea of romance.'

"Ooh, Igor — a dead rat! You shouldn’t have!"

Edgar Allen Poe

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Sauvignon Bonk

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

"You're such a good listener."

Venus

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

Dead Funny

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"Why don't you find a museum!"

"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"

'More bubbles!'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

"Been following me around all morning. I think it's the new intern."

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

'What the..? She IS a stick!'

Love linked

Paint pots in love

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Diamond outfits

"You're my Mona Lisa."

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

Love Conquers All

"Now there's a relationship that's working!"

STILL LIVES - Bolt: 'It's like we were made for one another!'

"But if you change your system preferences to match mine, is it really love?"

Missing You.

"Dessert?""No thanks, I'm stuffed."

"But until I do transmute lead into gold, maybe I could interest you in some lovely lead jewelry."