Dark Romantics Gifts

"Do you Death, take this woman until life do you part?"

Edgar Allen Poe

Life is for the birds.

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

'Oh my God. I love it!'

'You're overdue for your checkup.'

Sauvignon Bonk

Venus

"You're such a good listener."

'Charlie is the first to admit that he's too old for me.'

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

'More bubbles!'

'Alright, which one of you wise guys pulled the fire alarm?'

At home with the Bones...one skeleton yells at the dog chewing his leg, 'now cut that out!'

"Why don't you find a museum!"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

Dead Funny

Relationship counselor: 'She started behaving strangely, and our man-machine interface has become unpredictable.'

"I know we just met, but all I got is a twenty-four-hour pass!"

'The world already ended, but the government hushed it up.'

Diamond outfits

Hell Separates Real Madrid and Barcelona fans.

Love linked

Love Conquers All

Paint pots in love

"You're my Mona Lisa."

"O.K., time's up. Pencils down."

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

'I met him on a Monday and my heart stood still (would you believe?)')

"Now there's a relationship that's working!"

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

'What the..? She IS a stick!'

STILL LIVES - Bolt: 'It's like we were made for one another!'

"My only love sprung from my only hate!"