Dairyman Gifts

Dairyman with frozen pump

'It doesn't say, son, who bottlefed the calf while the cow was out jumping over the moon.'

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

A cat has caught a cow which it is dragging through it's cat flap.

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

"Black or white, Vicar?"

Freshest ice cream in town!

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

'Oh Hi!'

Cow's straw

Important Food Groups

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

"They’re real."

"It's a cow thing. You wouldn't understand."

Cheese

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

Miniature Cattle Fanciers

"You keep fumblin' with that bra, Cowboy, and you're never gettin' to second base."

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

"Wait, what are you doing?"

Bob thinks his new neighbor may be bad for business.

"Oh my god -- I can't believe it's real butter!"

Pull the udder one

Cow being force fed hormones and producing milk.

'You wanted a tractor intead of a wedding car, and our dogs as bridesmaids... so why shouldn't I have one of my cows as best man?'

'I think I'm lactose intolerant.'

'Then Jack told his mother they were getting out of the dairy business and going into crop production.'