Dairy Dreamers Gifts

"You keep fumblin' with that bra, Cowboy, and you're never gettin' to second base."

"If milk is such a nutritious body-building food, why does she have a body like that?"

'I wish I had that figure.'

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

Lactose Intolerant

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

'So where do you think pineapple juice comes from?'

McMorkim's Cheeses Security A gang of mice wheeling in a giant mousetrap with Pizza and Beer as bait to a Security Guard's post hoping to gain access to a cheese Factory if the Guard is trapped.

Where Skim Milk comes from.

'Oh Hi!'

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

Important Food Groups

The Main Types of Cheese

Cheese

"Grass-cream! Thanks Mum!"

Doughboy Dad

"Wait, what are you doing?"

"Oh my god -- I can't believe it's real butter!"

'I think I'm lactose intolerant.'

'It's a great film Pauline, I nearly milked myself laughing.'

"And I put it to you Mr. MacDonald, that on the morning of December 3rd, you had cold hands whilst attaching a milking machine to my client's udder!"

Cheese Pile

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

Cute cow drinking from a carton from Nestle

'I'm sorry but I have to let you go, we're all drinking 2%.'

"Cheese is just a substitute for the love you've never given me."

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

World of Cow.

The Nihilist Deli.

A consumer guide to cheese.

'A lot of my stories involve milk.'