Dairy Devotee Gifts

"So, you're telling me that my assets have been frozen?"

'Please tell me you didn't pay for that stuff.'

'MILK FIGHT!'

'Dude. I'm gonna say this, one...more...time. I do not know how to make cheese.'

A consumer guide to cheese.

'Room for cream?'

The miracle of genetic engineering

Don't worry, the first 30 years of working with dairy goats are the hardest.

'Have you tried pulling the udders?'

'There is so much penicillin in this milk we could use to to treat shipping fever!"

'I feel like such a failure: They have to process my milk to make it low-fat...'

Immature cheese pulling a face

"Have you heard the news? Ben & Jerry's is turning pro."

Fondue Heaven

'If powdered milk's your thing! I'm your gal!'

"You're lactose intolerant...that's udderly ridiculous!"

'Those Texas Longhorns are sure good mothers, Doc.'

"I understand they've bought a dairy farm."

'I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you're not expected to last much longer after your expiration date.'

Cow Exerecise

Cute cow drinking from a carton from Nestle

Milk Truck With Udders.

'If he says 'got milk', I'm gonna bite.

At the coffee shop, a cow is on the table where the milk is supposed to be.

One Man's Meat is Another Man's Poetry

"Cheese is just a substitute for the love you've never given me."

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

Tapped Tree

"And how’s my grass-fed, hormone-free cash cow doing today?"

"I understand goat cheese has had it."

"You have a complaint, but you need a civil rights attorney for a case of lactose intolerance.''

"America hasn't been discovered yet -- how about cheddar?"

Cheese/Extra Cheese

"Wait, what are you doing?"

"Oh my god -- I can't believe it's real butter!"