Cycle Crusader Gifts

"I'm bored: Let's go and swoop over cyclists' heads and scare the heck out of them..."

"It started as a crusade. Now it's just a commute."

Bikes versus Cars

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

Lanes Closed for the Hell of It

Two Players both holding the same cue.

Do not think outside the box!

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

Whack, Out of Whack.

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

Oil shock.

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"I miss the old cubicles."

"Please buddy, can you spare a carbon credit?"

It's a Dog's life

Energy performance certificate nailed to wall exhausts employer.

"You don't have anything planned for the next 196 years, do you?"

'I do the work of three men...how about giving one of us a decent salary?'

"Miles... I'm going abstract!"

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'They aren't shy about cutting you out of the decision making process.'

In the Fever Cubicle

'This is a very bad report, Jenkins. Go to your cubicle.'

"We've got a class-action suit if I ever saw one."

'Just how much carbon are we supposed to offset?'