Cubicle Fisherman Gifts

"Barnes! Put that fishing pole away and get back to work. And, thank you for installing this camera!"

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

'What sort of mission statement is that?'

'That's our mission statement.'

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Another day at work would be one too many...

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

Work Slave

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

"Keep up the good work, whatever it is, whoever you are."

Do not think outside the box!

Whack, Out of Whack.

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

You are here.

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

'They'll tell you this is an open office workspace, but watch out for the invisible fences.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

"To be honest the culture sucks, but the pay is amazing."

The Picture of Dorian Gray's Soul.

After years of working in an office without a door, Doug was moved to a door without an office.

"I've got an office and I've got a window, but I wouldn't say I've got a window office."

'Are we replacing you with a computer? Ha! That's a good one. If we replaced you with a chimpanzee it would be over qualified.'

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

Stacked In Tray

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.