Cubicle Crusaders Gifts

The Corporate Rat.

'I need a larger cubicle.'

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Another day at work would be one too many...

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

Work Slave

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"I tell you, it's a jungle out there!"

"All this namby pamby nonsense about stress...I've been stressed for YEARS and it's never done ME any harm... " "But you're only 25!"

Do not think outside the box!

'I'm not here looking for a job. I'm the temp who's replacing you when the boss fires you today.'

'Walter, stop fantasizing and get back to your desk.'

"He said his screen is frozen again."

Whack, Out of Whack.

'Chin up, Simpson, it's for the good of the firm.'

Busy day at the office.

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'Only another thirty-four years, five months and fourteen days until I retire.'

'Too long at his desk...we're going need surgery to cut him free.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

"It's another day, Phil. Planning to suit up?"

'Are these billable hours?'

"Jones is our go-to-thankless-job-guy!"

"The quicksand was corporate's idea. I wanted to fire you for going over my head. They wanted to send a message."

'I'm 43 years old. That's 64 in work years.'

The Picture of Dorian Gray's Soul.

'Miss Johnson, would you mind ordering me another computer? And you can cancel that call to tech-support.'

Stacked In Tray

One day, he hoped to hit the big time.