Crustacean Connoisseur Gifts

"Four bedrooms, oceanfront property, and it's in our price range?! What's the catch?"

Wealthy, frugal, maine lobsters furniture shopping.

'Dear, your father is just a big crab these days.'

Check out the nice crawdads I have in the bait bucket, George.

I rather like bucket and spade holidays.

The Main Types of Cheese

Cheese

"Joel! Killer crust!"

"My smelly French cheese is much better than your Canadian beef."

'Is this a party, a cheese and wine do, a cocktail party, a soiree or just another of your old cronies get-togethers?'

The Running of the Brie

"Just toot my horn and I'll be there."

Rejoice! It's time to celebrate the baby cheeses!

"Of course I love you more than cheese. What a silly question. In fact, cheese and I are just friends. Nothing's going on between cheese and me."

Great moments in 'Haute Cuisine'. . . America gives the world the Donut Sandwich.

Pizza with Extra Extra Cheese.

'Has someone cut the cheese?'

"Cheese is just a substitute for the love you've never given me."

"I'd like to see him try that on the leg press."

'Did anyone hand in a mature stilton last week?'

"I do lover a good prawn film!"

"You're amazing!"

'Thank you for noticing, Shirley - but beauty comes at a price, It hampers my hunting, limits my berry picking and typing's a real pain,'

'Snob, he won't eat domestic slugs, just imports.'

Still hemorrhaging; NBC cancels "The Cheeseheads"

"My love language - I give words of affirmation when receiving gifts of cheese."

"What a slobster."

Budget and swan, crayfish, pike

Baker

'OK, who ordered the prawn cocktail?'

'I don't like to question your map reading dear, but could you have another look at the last left turn?'

'I assume that's a rhetorical question.'

"He put up a decent fight."

Crusty Bread

'No more lobsters, my wife said, after our last one died.'