
See no evidence, hear no evidence, speak no evidence.
Searching for a gift for a crime critic who loves to analyze clues and solve mysteries? Our collection offers witty mugs, t-shirts, pillows, and prints that celebrate their sharp wit and detective spirit. Surprise the crime aficionado in your life with a gift that matches their passion for uncovering the truth and cracking the case—crafted with humor and intelligence.
See no evidence, hear no evidence, speak no evidence.
'I'm a grandfather. How would you like it if someone mugged your grandfather.'
"Thou shalt not kill. It's a sin. But people still commit murders, I'm happy to say. And the state kills the murderers...I'm twice as happy to say."
Child Crime, Child Time
Criminal lawyers - 3 crimes or less,
'Would you believe I'm following a higher law'
Lost and Found with Paedophiles and Criminals. Man from Home Office looking very pleased.
Any shohplifters with a social conscience avoids small businesses.
Don't worry, we're anti gun control.
Financial Corruption
Plea Bargain Deals of the Rich and Famous
'Am I being too suspicious or do you think it's possible that they're crooked?'
"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."
The Philip Marlow family
New York Corruption - Auditor Watson's Death, and Suspicions on Broadway Works Project
'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'
"Of course, when I say we the people I mean I the people."
I always forget - Are we supposed to tip?
'I don't care how you do it...just make it look like an accident.'
"I've been dumping bodies here for years, and it seems to me that the sea level is rising."
'And for those of you calling in to say he is behind us - OH NO he isn't.'
'Why is it always about me?'
Automatic Congressman
'Try to think of this as a learning experience.'
Justitia, the goddess of justice, is picking a dollar bill from the ground.
"Undiagnosed serial killer"
Disappearing Democracy
"By Ned, you're right, inspector—the body has been moved."
Cosa Nostradamus: "Listen, you mook. I predict if you don't pay the vig to the Don by tonight you'll be at the bottom of the Hudson by morning."
"Wear a wire? Oh, no, all of our police informants have gone wireless."
"Can you hear me now?"
'Make it look like an accident.'
Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.
Goal!
'Aghh! I've been visited by the Russian mafia.'
Discover a range of mugs perfect for crime critics—filled with witty sayings and clever designs to kickstart their investigative mornings.
Browse cozy pillows featuring detective-themed humor—ideal for crime critics who love to relax in style.
Check out our detective-inspired prints—great for decorating the space of any mystery lover or crime critic with wit and charm.
Explore our humorous t-shirts designed for crime enthusiasts—show off their detective flair with witty slogans and clever graphics.