Creative Typist Gifts

Shorthand

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Someone who knows apostrophes

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

Italica

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

'You say you type 80 words a minute ... Actually, that's not at all important...!'

'Don't worry. I'm not charging you for the extra lettering.'

'Very good and to the point.'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

'As you know, some of us can't keep up with the pace of new technology.'

'No, boss, this isn't a secret code. My spell check is broken and this is what my typing actually looks like.'

“The two spaces after a period were a dead giveaway.”

'How many words per minute do you type?'

'Nice graphics.'

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

'Your training will be the next five minutes watching my fingers move at the speed of light.'

'How can you make so many mistakes in one report?'

'Why is it when you hit two keys by mistake, the one you don't want appears on the screen?'

'How could Homer write The Iliad and The Odyssey with a quill pen on parchment when I can't write a memo with a computer?'

Progression of human writing, from chisled stone to computers until 2000 when the computer has blown up

'How many words a minute do you type?' - 'Big ones or little ones?'

'Yes, we can get all this into your ad, but we'll have to set the copy in 0.00005 point type.'

School of Arts and Sciences.

'I told you. . . H not S!'

Unknown historical typos: Isaac Newton presser, 1687

"Oh, it's not just the sign. Everything here is set in Comic Sans."

'I can type 500 words per minute.'

Extreme Intimacy.

Writer breaks in new electric typewriter.

'Sorry.. I don't date lower-case types.'

Nice moves—is that an air piano or are you doing the E-Mail?"

'What does carpal tunnel syndrome feel like?'