Country Humor Fans Gifts

The Assistant

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'If you're not doing anything, come on over and we'll shoot the bull!'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

Nice six-pack!

Close, but no cigar!

'Serves me right for frowning.'

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

'Got any cud flavour?'

A cow's bedside table.

Junior's switch to electronic chewing tobacco was short-lived.

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

That's one harmonious butt hole!

I'm a Smart-Cow!

'It's got all the original features.'

'Sure, the farmer always shouts or whistles at me, but deep down, he's a softy...'

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!

"This looks like a job for Agman!"

"A little to the left. No, too far. Go back three inches and straight down."

'Those plug in air-fresheners seem to do the trick.'

"You're free to range. Just stay away from that Tiffany—she's trouble."

Psst! Stay in character!

Well, I'm glad the tumble drier broke, actually!

Oooh! That's handy (Pulling draw out of chest).

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?