Country Humor Fan Gifts

'If you're not doing anything, come on over and we'll shoot the bull!'

"I'm what you call a 'Ruralsexual'."

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

Red trousers at night - shepherd's delight.

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

"I'm an enigma!"

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

Cattlemans Saloon.

I told you not to use horse liniment as an underarm deoderant...

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

....aaaand.... HELICOPTER!

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

Clang clang. Uncle Ernie, why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don't work.

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

'I met my wife on Faeces Book.'

I'm WAAAY beyond Kinder Surprise!

Early American Think tank

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

"I'm tired of having to apologize for the condition of the house."

Nice six-pack!

Close, but no cigar!

'Serves me right for frowning.'

That's one harmonious butt hole!

Wordilly Durdillies - A cow putt

'Don't worry about retirement Irma: There's more to life than just laying eggs...'

"It's the fabled Mongolian Herd!"

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

Prank Cattle Calls. (mmph)