Country Comedy Gifts

'For what we are about to receive...'

'MILK ME!'

"Year after year we sit here quietly raising eyebrows, son."

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

I fart more than that!

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

'If you're not doing anything, come on over and we'll shoot the bull!'

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

Testing...testing...one, two, three...

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

What's your returns policy on faulty goods?

That's one harmonious butt hole!

The Moo-Walk

Clancy Strip: Out of Business

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

A chicken coop with a loudspeaker on the roof

A cow's bedside table.

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

Junior's switch to electronic chewing tobacco was short-lived.

'Serves me right for frowning.'

Cow Fishing on the mighty tundra.

I'm a Smart-Cow!

"Oh lord, I think we're in a Japanese horror movie!"

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!

This one needs re-booting!

The Assistant

Throw another hedgehog on the fire, would you pet?

Would you mind if I hung round your backside for a while?

Psst! Stay in character!

Look lively ladies! We have 2 milk poachers at 3 o'clock!

"The middle of nowhere was too dead for us, so we moved her to the outskirts of nowhere where there's a lot more going on!"