Cost Of Living Crusader Pillows

'After income tax, pension and national insurance, I end up owing

"Never mind about tall, dark men, who's going to pay my energy bills?"

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

'I blame the nothing for something culture.'

Phil would get giddy after a large print run, but the company was saving a fortune.

'And finally, a steady decline in earnings has forced us to trim the presentations budget.'

With all that Christmas baking left, that's a bad thing...(egg prices soar).

"Look at this terrible mess! Let's all roll up our sleeves and clean it up!"

Too many people post comments in the heat of anger. They strike while the ire is hot!

"I'm afraid it's a bad case of libel!"

"I avoid the 3 'Bs' when I'm dieting - boxes, buckets and bags."

A man with a deflated bicycle stands in line at the tire inflator.

"I never ask for a raise any more. I just hack into the boss's computer and give myself one."

'We all contribute something to the world... my contribution is toxic waste.'

'He's been driven mad by reading about all these huge litigation cases...'

"How much energy did you use to create me? I wasn't awakened with nuclear power, was I?..."

We have too many students! I know. Send them home!

'And exactly how much less did it cost to implement Five Sigma instead of Six, Dwayne?'

Been Injured In An Accident That Wasn't Your Fault! Call...Wilbur & Ohnson.

Graduation Bill.

"I'd like to lose 35%of me!"

'Because I paid ten bucks for that lure, that's why.'

"In order to cut costs we are no longer animating our presentations..."

'Brian's decided to reduce his carbolic foot-print.'

Personal Calorie Counter

"Nowadays we all have to make sacrifices and 2500 bucks a month for this beautiful two-room apartment is really not too much to ask."

Great customer care is not optional.

"I'm doing this for you, my loves."

"This company wants to make money, NOT spend money. Turning on the lights would go against our goal."

Energy bills rise

'Donald came out of the recovery room this morning, bit had to go back after seeing the bill.'

'I'm serving you with a schedule of dilapidation.'

'We would save even more money if we delivered mail ONLY on Saturdays...'

High Calorie Area - Run For Your Life

"Go away. I haven't had an accident that wasn't my fault in the last three years."