Corporate Parties Gifts

'I should have told you, every Friday senior partners get to do the Prosecco Polonaise.'

"Excuse me, One has not actually signed the agreement yet!"

'As company chairman I'd like to thank you all for participating in the evenings entertainment and saving me ?4000.'

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

'Notice how all the stress disappears from your body.'

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'Why is it that nothing ever gets done at these meetings?'

"So what kind of mood is he in?"

"This position has become very important to the company."

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

'That's our mission statement.'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Children's Parties

'Yes, I know there's a deadline on this project.'

21st century water cooler conversations.

"I spent all day learning productivity hacks"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"Don't forget to leave me a wakeup call so I can get the worm!"

Bo're'droom

"The meeting will come to order."

Here and There Trays

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

That shows business confidence.

Cow Pinatas

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

Sign - Halt manager crossing

"That report on corporate redundancy... I'd like it in triplicate."