Corporate Christmas Party Gifts

"Is it just me, or did this sales meeting suddenly take a dark turn?"

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

Bo're'droom

'No, it's not really good - that's our lawsuits-to-earnings ratio.'

'Do you want to tell them their department is being downsized again, or should I?'

'He was only reaching for his powerpoint presentation pointer.'

Fred wonders if he should go see what's happening in accounting.

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is, none of us will be alive then.'

"He'll do anything to say in power."

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

Businessman: 'We're like one big family here, because of all the nepotism.'

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

"In accordance with our new 'sharing of responsibilities initiative,' you'll all be responsible for getting my coffee." i

Determined not to make a fool of himself Mitch keeps practicing every dance move for the Annual Office Christmas Party!

Smoking Area. Oh, I don't smoke. I'm just addicted to ten-minute breaks.

'Here are some bonus checks. Distribute them unfairly.'

Pizza time.

'Give it to me straight, Mr. Erskine. Is there a downside to unmitigated greed?'

"At least we're consistent ... "

"You're wondering why I've called you here."

'Our first mistake was hiring an honest accounting firm.'

'I apologize for sending out the meeting memo late. Let me summarize by saying that the entire board is being replaced starting tomorrow.'

"All those in favor of adjourning for treats, raise your hands?"

'When I say jump, Hayes, I don't want you to just ask 'How high?' ... I want you to show me!'

December 26 - Vegas, office (post) Christmas party.

"We could hire another accountant and secretary, but wouldn't it be fun to have a barista?"

'It's from my staff...make sure it's not carnivorous.'

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

Team Work

Meeting Pie Chart

"Having our team all work on the same page has been a lot more difficult since our company has gone paperless."

"The Duke and Duchess of A.T. & T., the Count and Countess of Citicorp, the Earl of Exxon, and the Marchioness of Avco. The Duke of Warnaco..."

Rudolph the brown-nosed reindeer.

'There always seems to be ONE trouble-maker in the company who gets a sick thrill from rebelling against our corporate culture!'

'Well, why didn't you say you wanted the office to be functional?'