Corporate Annual Meeting Gifts

'No wonder we're losing money! --This organizational chart is upside down!'

OK, we do the annual report as a graphic novel, but only if I don't have to read it.'

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

"Alright, who said that?"

Businessman's schedule full of confrontations.

Why don't you join my board, Harry - I need a friendly face.

"Our profits have been out-sourced ."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'As you can see by the pie chart, most of our expenses go to well, pie.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

"We're experienced an extraordinary amount of growth this year."

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Bo're'droom

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

"Ok, do we agree the minutes of the last meeting?"

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

'Mr. Dawson, about when I said 'don't pull any punches'...'

Lethal Presentation

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

"Here, we do not procrastinate, we 'table' things."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'...and so you see our profits, not unlike Sir Isaac Newton, have felt the effects of gravity.'

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

Buisnessman Of The Hour - I'd like to introduce our guest but he is 45 minutes late

"Look at them smiling. They've reached their comfort zone."

'Hi - I'm your company perk !'

"Imagine if only 1/2 the companies that claimed to have a great culture actually did."