Cooking Enthusiasts T-Shirts

'...tail of cat..tongue of toad and a good pinch of monosodium glutamate...'

"Am I to see beef bourguignon in this inkblot?"

'Of course, the self-cleaning models tend to cost a little more.'

6,000 BC: Neolithic Barbecue

'The telly's full to bursting with these food shows!'

"That's the wrong one! You've just thrown our chips away."

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Life is for the birds.

Domestic Goddess.

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

"Yo, Cézanne, paint faster. I need those grapes for the Madeira sauce."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

'Don't look at me. I'm not the one who puts the measuring cups where I can't reach them.'

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

'Er . . . and a fork for me...'

"Compliments to the chef! Pass it on."

The Coffee Shop Vats of New Jersey

Health and Safety Gone Mad.

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Man with 'Real Ale' written on t-shirt, woman with 'Real Pine' written on rolling pin

'You realize we're only having three people over...'

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

"The recipe said to let the chicken rest after it comes out of the oven!"

Party time.

"Tia Carmen's not happy unless she can send people away with a plate of leftovers for the road."

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

Baker Romance

"It's smells so good, but why do you have to wait so long?!"

'I was in the catering corps.'

"What time did you say you wanted me to start drinking?"

"We've misjudged the tapas again."

"I'll be glad when the television is fixed."