Contract Crusaders Gifts

"How's this? 'Employee grants to Company, throughout the universe, the omniverse, including all fictional universes of parallel universes yet to be discovered...'"

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"They've hiked up our targets again...I'm going to have to put in some overtime to have any chance of meeting them!"

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

"Everyone, please welcome our new VP of being promoted and paid lots more than you for no apparent reason!"

"Where are you guys going?" "We’re out of here!" "It’s October 28th!" "The new team are running late. We need you to stay until February 2025!" "But I’m tired!!" "How do we know they won’t bail on us again?"

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

'I blame the nothing for something culture.'

'There he goes, the bravest M&A knight that our kingdom has ever known.'

The Devil's in the detail!

'Please remember, it's not a lie if it turns a profit.'

'Risky, but I like it!'

'This is the last time we post job openings,'

Production: Urgent, Rush, Super Rush.

'I have a typical nine to five job. It's enough work for nine people and I'm treated like a five year old.'

'I didn't realize we'd employed a cyber bully in you, Miss Tweedy.'

Twisted Peel works overtime.

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

'Have you seen the ruddy margins the Chinese expect us to take up for this work?'

"I know it's not in our nature, but we really gotta stop charging everything."

Man on a unicycle trying to guard credit from nasty 'Bankruptcy'.

'I have enough confidence in our project to put our money where our lawyer's mouth is.'

'I always feel at the end of the day I could've taken credit for more.'

He calls it 'delegating authority' I call it 'passing the buck'

"A handshake is as good as a thirty-page contract, eh, Mr. Harrison?"

'They never let you forget that your intellectual property belongs to them.'

'Let's run it through legal.'

Not The Real Me

Union organizer in a hostile workplace. . .

"Somebody in Boise needs my help. Run a credit check."

"I don't see much borrowing on your credit report but I do see a lot of begging and stealing."

'Forget your two million pound recording contract. When are you going to get a steady job?'

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract..."