Contract Champion Gifts

Corporate Lawyers

Knight with a pen in an LLP.

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

"Where are you guys going?" "We’re out of here!" "It’s October 28th!" "The new team are running late. We need you to stay until February 2025!" "But I’m tired!!" "How do we know they won’t bail on us again?"

"Okay, I'll renew your contract and raise you five sick days."

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."

The Devil's in the detail!

"I like your thinking Steve. Hiding the contract loopholes under the staples is brilliant."

'There's really no need for confusion. Part 95 of section 33 of Article L in the contract clearly states ...'

'Watch it...I'm carrying a concealed weapon...my lawyer.'

'You have the contract drafted by the lawyer. This is his bill for it.'

"You can't quit my bridal fashion business. It says so in the prenup, I man the non-compete agreement!"

'I have enough confidence in our project to put our money where our lawyer's mouth is.'

The contract was not worth the paper it was written on, which considering the paper was not a good sign.

'I agreed to guide you, My contract says nothing about pulling a sleigh,'

"A handshake is as good as a thirty-page contract, eh, Mr. Harrison?"

Don't forget to read the small print.

'Let's run it through legal.'

"My loophole out-loopholes your loophole."

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract..."

"Norman doesn't like any loose ends in his contracts, he likes everything tied up tight...it can be a problem..."

"Only three wishes, eh? Well, let's see what my lawyer has to say about that!"

"I want the contract to say that if we win a championship of any sort, no one spills champagne on my head."

'Forget your two million pound recording contract. When are you going to get a steady job?'

"Perfect! Since our company's motto is 'transparency,' make the contract's fine print light gray against white."

"You misread the terms of your employment. Your probation period is 6 years, not 6 months."

"What happened to the good old days when people just breached contracts?'

Every Friday lunchtime procurement managers would gather to boast of the size of bid documents they had received that week.

"The only thing wrong with Capitalism is competition. Sign this non-compete agreement."

Publishing Clauses Of The '90s.

'So, what are the terms of use?'

"And despite recent insinuations, this loan contract being signed by my client is perfectly legitimate."

'You're close to becoming the indispensable man, Grisnill - you keep finding loopholes.'