Content Promoter Gifts

'How fast can you hype?'

He was destined for greatness. Whatever that meant.

'My manuscript is available for download on the internet. I'll email the link to you.'

Convention for People Who Like to Attend Conventions.

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

Garage Music

"With your voice and my marketing skills, we'll sell records by the million!"

Make love not war

Advertising space on jockeys' bottoms

'I've been made junior partner.'

"You'll get an office, a pay increase and a set of bad nicknames from your colleagues."

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

"Sure I'd love to buy thirty thousand subscriptions."

"I'm doing a think piece on me."

"Don't peddle your new book until the seminar's over."

"Big promotion for you Khanna - from Data Scientist to Big Data Scientist."

'You want a raise? - You only started work yesterday!'

'Usherettes and razzamatazz won't bring back the crowds - we need some new lions'.

"Narrative play is dead."

'Oh I retired a few months back...I'm a promoter now.'

"Our only hope is that the book gets banned."

"So much for that publicity stunt."

'Don't worry, I'm just here to promote my book.'

"We're going paperless, so we'll have to find you another office."

Archers.

"You gotta admit, they rock PRETTY hard for a group with no arms."

"And now, our newest hit song..."

'He's got laryngitis. I'll have to speak for him.'

'When he said he was going to promote staff health and fitness and encourage a little weight loss I thought he'd be giving us gym passes.'

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.