Construction Confusion Connoisseur Gifts

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

"Living in a city with functional infrastructure must be so boring."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

Instructional guide to scribbling

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

"We're having one heck of a time building that trapezoidal thing of yours..."

"That was totally....what's the word I'm looking for?"

'As Chuck's definition of terroir dragged past the 20-minute mark, Suzy concluded, the longer the explanation, the less likely you know what the word means.'

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

'I'm going to add to the confusion. I'm going to sign my name upside-down.'

"Hey, I just consider myself very fortunate to be getting paid for something I'd be doing anyway."

"I don't need a lecture Dad, I know all I need to know from the online tutorials of @DamKing61, @HotDam72 and @DamEasy27. . ."

Origami horse leaping out of a book about origami

Once again overbudget and past dealine, the predatory boa constractor adroitly squeezes the life from its victim's wallet.

"I said to make a thousand CLONES."

Cutaway view of house undergoing renovation

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

'I think this is deep enough for the foundations!'

Crane fishing

'She must be good at mixing cement - She's been making rock cakes for years.'

About the potter.

Driver sees road sign: 'Right Lane Doomed'

Man-made vs dog-made

"Could I have a Tommy Tippee cup for my friend's beer, as he's been using a concrete breaker all day."

"The door-to-door sales rep was very persuasive, but in my defense he only sold me one."

"No, we're looking for a roofer, not a woofer."

Folding Container.

"That's it - I've had it up to here with measurement devices."

'We're starting to build our own house. How much is this two by four?'

"Just so you understand in advance - we're not old-time craftsmen, and we don't take pride in our work."

'It's a good building contract legally, but your jargon's weak.'

'The spheres keep rolling away, Your Majesty -- how about we just build a pyramid?'

'Your dilemma is fabulous. Imagine what a dramaturge could do with it.'

'I need a green house built ASAP.'

'Sander's a bit high isn't it?'