Constitutional_wizard Gifts

'I don't care what the U.S. Congress does with the Bill of Rights. Up here, we do not amend the 10 Commandments.'

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

'At Tesmer holdings, we don't break the rules! We change them!'

'Technically, I was making fun of your writing ability.'

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

'He will observe your text now...'

'When I registered for this class, in computer programming, nobody told me that it's all about converting caffeine into computer code.'

'Here comes the 64-bit local bus.'

Tech support...can I help you!

"Making us more mobile friendly didn't mean letting the general public use our car park, Smithers."

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"

'Yes, I'm very punctual. I always use commas and periods.'

'I think I set the security level, on my anti virus software, too high. Whenever I access anything it is automatically deleted.'

Progression of human writing, from chisled stone to computers until 2000 when the computer has blown up

Manual Labor.

'Sorry.. I don't date lower-case types.'

'My app just ate your widget.'

The new US Embassy in London is conceived as a solar collector, with pillow like panels of high-tech plastic and photovoltaic cells....and emegency vertical takeoff capability,

Error 202: The cursor has left the screen.

'What's the use? Everyone has his own PC future-probability program these days.'

"But what if a tyrant comes to power and no one's able to stop him because the whole thing's king of funny."

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and fast.'

'We're not interested in how you work with people, just computers.'

"Maybe it's just me, Stan, but I keep getting the nagging feeling that your company doesn't place a very high value on information technology."

'Too many exclamation points!!!!!!'

It's 10pm do you know where your 401-k is?'

True Loves

"And I can install the latest version of Microsoft as well as Word and 17 other applications!"

"I don't know how to do fractions, but I do know how to build a computer that does them for me."

"You're a gifted writer, although at times you're just too precious."

The Keyboard

'Tech support says your anti-virus software did not catch the problem since it is not a virus. It's a bacterium.'