Confused Entrepreneur Gifts

Man panicing because woman has washed his money filled shorts

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

Money Plant.

'Nothing like being your own boss, huh?'

Man in Therapist office sees a sign: Therapy Is Expensive Bubble Wrap Is Cheap You Decide

"Tea parties are passé. I'm opening a craft brewery."

"Every single day, guys ask you for advice about women, work, sports... Haven't you ever even heard of the law of supply and demand?. . .I'd be glad to steer the downtrodden and the forlorn your way for a mere 82% of the man-to-man-talk fee."

Setting up companies

"When I was making money, I made the most money, and now that I'm spiritual I'm the most spiritual."

"I'm hoping to sell my startup - a chain of fast-food meditation centers - to Google for seven figures."

We have an all volunteer workforce, and we're still losing money!

"I got napkins, family photos, and the strongest lip balm in the city."

"So that's my presentation: Could I have 100 million for the startup?"

Street person selling bricks from wall he's leaning on.

"Regular, grande, or lemon latte?"

'Seven companies in three years.'

"Darby, Bandit, Piper & Spike - Dogs."

"Weed cookies"

"I don't know what it means, but since my mom added that word, sales have gone through the roof."

Mulk

… and so, Rudy had become a ground floor investor in Yell, the web site that publishes make-or-break restaurant reviews from a screaming infant. Hence Rudy's invite to the strategic investor meetings. Most of you know me. I'm Tad Johnson, managing partner with Johnson and Steel. Yell! I guess the two questions I hear most: Do we have a viable business model, and what happens when the infant gets old enough to talk or be discerning about food? The answer to both is: Let's hop we all get rich befo

'And what makes you think there's a market for golden eggs?'

"The little match girl realized too late what her mistake had been. She had failed to diversify."

Cow selling milk from small roadside stand.

"Right, all those in favour of a car boot sale?"

'Someday, son, this can be all yours.'

"Ya know, Frank. . . we should put an ad in the paper. . . Pete and Frank's trash removal and dispersal service."

An ice cream van surrounded by igloos

What are you doing? - 'I've set up an e-commerce site.' - 'What are you selling?' - 'Signed copies of my old boxer shorts.' - 'Washed £7. Unwashed £23.' - 'Yeah, baby. Market forces.' -

"I love being my own boss, but I hate being my own employee."

"If I ever get my own business, I'm going to practice the Golden Rule."

How come you never take any of my ideas seriously? I'm a marketing genius. I have a long track record of attracting business in both the residential and commercial sectors. What? When? Where? I've generated hundreds of billions of simoleans in the last 24 years. Wait ... Are you taking about Sim City"? Everything I touch turns to solid gold!

"...and who might you ask was responsible for this mistake?"

'I should've known it sounded too good to be true!'