Conference Conjurer T-Shirts

'Is anyone chairing this meeting?'

"Your wonderful daughter and I would like to become engaged in F.Y. '97, married in F.Y. '98, and if the numbers look good, start a family in F.Y. '99."

'Needs salt!'

Bright Idea

Witch's Brew.

Flour, sugar, earth, air, fire, water.

Ghostbasters 3

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

"Stop, stop right there. That's it, that's the Anderson contract."

Guitars in Heaven

'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

Goldylocks and the Three Beers.

Oil Spill: 'Oh dear! That was the last of our extra virgin.'

The Thinker and Creative Thinker.

"I'm writing a memoir. It's mostly recipes."

'I'm a voice over artist.'

"You think you're so damn Cordon Bleu!"

'Sir, we have a problem. The attorney section is totally overcrowded!' (demon to Satan)

'There's been an update. Instead of abracadabra, it's option/control key.'

"Don't hold back on the toad legs now - I'm through with Nouvelle Cuisine!"

'Unethical advertising uses falsehoods to deceive the public. Ethical advertising uses the truth to deceive the public.'

Advertising Agency - "...Fooling some of the people all of the time is damn hard work."

'I warned you counselor, no more tricks.'

"Let 'em try to regulate this!"

"Try and push the eye of newt and wing of bat casserole."

My Cauldron Rules

Try typing "wishes," then hold down the "command" key.

'This is taking forever. We should've just microwaved it.'

"Anyone having a 'Eureka!' moment?"

You ever wonder what would've happened if Nintendo had never existed? There'd have been no Mario Bros., and since Sega created Sonic to compete, there'd be no Sonic. And without those, the market wouldn't have been big enough to interest Sony. So … no Playstation. And no Playstation, no Xbox. Several generations of awkward teens would've had to come up with other excuses not to go outside. Sometimes I wonder if it rained where I grew up.

Fallen Angel.

Indian executive playing flute to a business chart like a snake charmer.

'I wish you'd cook dinner!'

'Dad says you can throw your voice. Toss it here.'

Moments Later, David Blaine Would Be Crushed Into Nothingness.