Computer Conqueror Gifts

"Easy with that computer, Martha. It senses fear."

'How to beat a computer.'

"Thanks for the offer... but I'd rather see if tech support can get my computer running."

Rage.

Second lifeReal life.

A woman wearing a skin sitting behind a desk with a nameplate that reads "Sheena, Queen of the corporate jungle."

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

'Of course, the toll on my personal life has been enormous.'

Why am I running?

'I'm feeling absolutely marvelous. I think I'll acquire another company.'

"I believe he was the victim of a hostile takeover."

'Hand over the last one now kid or you're getting my fist for Christmas!'

'These new video games are getting out of hand...'

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'...and what's more, my databank has more data than your databank.'

Crop duster wanted.

"Damn it, Gwendolyn, you know when you married me I only moved one square at a time."

"Go ahead. Click on 'I Am Not A Robot.' I dare you."

"Yeah, I keep a clean desk. Now all the mess is in the computer!"

"I advise a slow, steady stream of lawsuits to weaken your enemies resistance. We call it time release litigation."

'I sent an employee to a motivational seminar once. He came back and took my job.'

' I see Brad's playing his new video game again.'

'It's about your reports, Mittens. They're incomprehensible -- It's as if you walked across the keyboard, laid down and rolled over it a hundred times, then took a nap on it.'

"Somehow I thought they'd be a bit SCARIER."

'I am not a robot.'

National corporate ladder of success monument.

"...and how often do you feel monkas?"

'He works in Acquisitions.'

"You go pillage. I can loot from here."

'Rubbing it no longer produces a genie. Now you need a username, password and an unreadable CAPTCHA.'

"The employees from the two companies are adapting very well to the merger. I wish I could say the same about the computer systems!"

"Where do you see yourself in five moves?"

"No man's going to stop me from getting to the top!"

'Buzz Off! I'm busy!'