Commute Critic Gifts

End of the World 8 Miles, Next Exit 10 Miles.

"When the roll is called up yonder, I shall be very much surprised if any of the Penn Central management people are there."

They decided to give up on public transport to get to work and rely on continental drift instead.

'It's an app that tells me when metro will get its act together.'

Metro Sapien.

"Sorry I'm late, train crashed again."

I'd throw myself on the line if I thought there was a chance of getting an ambulance home!

Lift buttons read: East Side/West Side/All Around the Town.

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

'It's not easy to get one of these - before that you have to have found a parking space!'

'Next plane to Los Angeles is at 3.'

"Does the No. 1 stop here and does that go to Penn Station and can I get a train there to Philadelphia and then how do I get to Walnut Street?"

"Take me home now!"

"Do you mind?"

"His commute to work's been getting shorter."

Bus for Giraffes.

"I dreamed last night that I had a job within walking distance."

"I can't stand working in the office, but I don't mind the commute."

Road work next 15 years.

'Back in 1956 you were the youngest Briton to cover the Hungarian uprising. You are presently writing your memoirs in Sardinia. First question: how do you feel about the sorry state the London Underground is in?'

Martian Rovers find proof of intelligent life on the red planet.

A man reads "Traffic Times" while stuck in traffic.

NEXT EXIT Food & Drink Cafe...Open 24 hours: 'Hey! Here's the place we saw advertised on the freeway!'

Trapeze artists commuting

I Love This Job...Its Just The Commuting I can't Stand.

Road Guilt

'Remind me not to carpool with Paul again.'

Congestion Eases Inexplicably

'Turn right at the first $4.09 unleaded, then a hang a left at $4.03 unleaded, and over the bridge, past the $4.01 unleaded...'

Hi honey, I'm on the plinth.

"Me, it's not a shower I crave for after a hard day at work, it's a long, long, long bath..."

"Lockdown was almost over. At home Gerald furiously practised his harassed commuter look."

"Wouldn't it be faster if we just flew to Brooklyn?"

City Bus...Leave the driving to us!

"It makes the commute that much easier."