Commitment Skeptic Gifts

"This is my last visit, Martha. I got the marriage posthumously annulled."

"As a salesman, I'm an honest guy. Before we enter into a relationship I want to read the small print."

'Do you, Robert, take Amanda to be your fifth lawfully wedded wife?'

"I made a trial new year's resolution so I can test it out to see if it's something I can live with for a year.

The head of the legal department gets married

"Please take a look at my marriage certificate. Try to find a loophole."

"You've caught me at an awkward time, can I call you back when I'm single?"

"These oaths aren't binding all weekend are they?"

'No way, Jose. I'm a free-range chick.'

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'I'm sorry, Lenny, but marriage is a privilege, not a right.'

'We're more or less engaged - he's just waiting for his fiancée to return the ring.'

Bob still had a few commitment issues.

'I said commit to me.'

'Marry you? What's in it for me?'

'He's never gonna marry me now, Mum.'

'I now pronounce you man and wife, for what it's worth,'

"I don't even have a relationship with a bank."

"Define poorer..."

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'No, but thanks for asking,'

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'I want to finish with him, but I'll have to wait until he's made the final payment on my engagement ring.'

'Or you can rent by the week...'

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

"Instead of making a long-term commitment to marriage, I've decided to lease a man."

"I really like this one – but I'm afraid of getting hurt again."

"I need to know if you're really serious about our relationship."

Man playing with echos: 'Hellooooo...How are you....I love you...' 'I'm not ready for that kind of committment!'

'I wonder if you'd go out with me. I've always wanted to go to couples therapy.'

Preachers with far too much input

"I never get a girls name tattooed on a first date."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

'I do - allowing for a 50 margin of error...'

'I don't know, Randy - Marriage is so INTRUSIVE.'