Comical Parents Pillows

'It doesn't matter if it's a boy or a girl as long as it'll make enough money for a good retirement home for us!'

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

'Are we there yet?'

'Oh dear. He's got my eyes.'

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

"You got the dolls yesterday? My mom says I took nine months!"

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

'Quick, I'll give you a piggyback ride home, otherwise, we'll get in trouble for being late...'

Fat Kid 14- Gets re-animated

'Oh Darling look. He's got your colour boogies!'

'Well it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

'Oh wonderful! All day I've been waiting for that burp!'

'Dad, are you sure this is building the right muscles for football?'

The inventor of the Slip 'n Slide becomes a father.

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

"So much for eternal rest."

For Heavens sake - don't let your pet watch manga cartoons on TV anymore!

"I think our bundle of joy needs his mommy, dear!"

"When I said you could use other materials with the sand, I was thinking shells and driftwood."

'Can you do the dishes, love. I'll do the school run.'

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

Oh, Wow! With all this baby food flying around, I can't wait until he starts eating steak!!!

"I've got 2 WONDERFUL children. 2 out of 5 isn't bad I suppose!"

'That's the most extreme linear nigra I've ever seen!!'

'I took her to register in kindergarten, and they wanted a damage deposit.'

'Don't worry about me, mom, I'll be fine as long as you keep working!'

'I can't sleep Dad. Tell me another scary story?'

I'm going to have a baby girl soon. What's a good name for a baby girl, Randy? Wait … you're going to have a what? Tell me you didn't just say what I think you said, little buddy. I'm going to have a baby girl. Met a lady, we fell in love, got married, and now we're going to have a baby girl. Wait ... you're talking about some video game, aren't you? I'm thinking of naming her SIMantha, but that might bee too obvious.

The cost of bringing up children soars to more than £140,000.

Our Yuppie Dad

'I understand you are going to be my son's teacher this year. Let me start off by saying: I am so so sorry!'

'Yes, Bobby, we are there. In fact, you can jump out any time you like.'

'A grass box for the children is a wonderful idea.'

"Those D's are misleading."