Comical Injury Taker Gifts

'Tape it up real tight, Floyd ... and the other ankle too.'

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

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Footballer with a broken leg and a ball in his cast.

"I don't think the crackling sound coming from your lower back is as serious as you thought. Just relax and I'll have this Rice Krispie Square out of your back pocket in no time."

Basketball injuries.

St John's ambulance member "I prefer rugby myself, more blood shed"

'Said he was fixing the ceiling fan. . .'

"You've been traded to the Red Sox for an outfielder with a broken arm."

'I think this fishing injury is more serious than you're letting on!'

"What a darling chihuahua! Is he friendly?"

'Very funny!'

'I didn't have a fall. I fell.'

"He's brutal but considerate - that's his victims' support number, NHS direct."

Career Threatening Sport Injuries,

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

'It's an old work injury.'

Stretcher Header.

'I tried to slam a revolving door.'

'Well, Mr. Swine, it looks like you pulled a hamstring.'

'Occupation?'

'Should we abstain from sex?'

'Chainsaw Championships.'

'He should be okay, it's just a little tap on the head.'

Finishing line cuts open athlete.

'Very funny!'

"Your birthday came at just the right time. I sprained my ankle this morning."

'I'm on the back stretch, about halfway down...I think it's a pulled hamstring.'

Pitchers arm falls off.

'It's his ankle - get some ice!!'

'The ligaments in both legs are torn to shreds. However, the drumsticks, thighs, wings and breasts should still be fine... either baked or fried.'

'I suggest you refrain from reaching into your untamed bird's cage in the future.'

'He tried to jump over the net.'

Oooh, where'd you get that bruise?